Letter to India at 1 year old

Dear India,

I’ve wanted to write you a letter for some time now but something has always prevented me from actually finding the right time or the right language. But today I feel i cannot put it off any longer. I have agonised over the right words to use, and written and re-written this letter in my mind a thousand times, so as to get the wording perfect. I have feared that i would not be able to sound eloquent enough and still be able to capture just how much i love you. So finally, i have decided to eat my pride and just write all of the things i want and need to tell you.

You love music and i love you loving music! Your favourite song is ‘Coin Laundy’ by Lisa Mitchell. You dance when the beat hits you and you don’t care who’s watching! You sing, oh how sweetly you sing. Your little neck strains as you try to hit those high notes and i relish the sound like no other! I hope your love of music continues.

You love food. You love the feel and the smell and the taste. You started solids at 4months old and have never looked back. You make a whimpering sound when we are getting your bottle ready that shouts “HURRY UP!!!”. Your favourite solid food is pasta or anything noodle related. Im so grateful that you are not a fussy eater and i attribute a full belly to why you also sleep so well. I hope your love affair with food continues.

You love books. If you are not dancing or singing or eating you are looking at your books. You drag books over to me and daddy all day long in the hope that we will sit and read to you. I do not have the strength to say no as i watch you go to the book box, pick your favourites, carry them across the room and then back your little bottom into my lap. Your favourite book is a pop-up story called ‘The Owl Who Was Afraid of the Dark’. I hope your love of literature continues.

India, you are such a happy child. You have these big blue eyes that smile and captivate. I cannot go anywhere without people stopping me to comment on how happy you are. Strangers will stop me on the street because they see and feel your happy energy and you ALWAYS indulge their kindness with a smile or a laugh or a tilt of the head and a batter of those big flirtatious eyes. You seem to feed off the attention and just when i think you’ve had your fill, a new martyr steps up and nourishes your ever hungry sense of self. I love this about you. I love that the whole world revolves around you, and even though at times I feel suffocated in your world, you reserve the most love for me, and that stifled feeling is obliterated in your smile.

You certainly can have your off days, days where your demands just do not seem to be met; but not for lack of trying. On those days you express yourself with tears and grunts and the occasional throwing of toys or body parts. I have come to accept the fact that you are a passionate person. You love with an unrestrained intensity and it is not hard to deduce that you will therefore bemoan with the same tenacious resolve, no matter how unjustifiable your protests may be. The silver lining of all is this; that regardless of what provoked said outburst you will always seek me for comfort afterward. This is something i pray will continue into eternity. I hope you will always consider the refuge of my arms as capable of providing all the comfort and safety you need to move on after a hardship.

I want you to know that you were wanted. Your daddy and i planned for you and prayed for you and loved you even before God formed you in my womb. And we will love you until the end of forever, come what may. You are now a 1 year old. People often ask me how old you are, as though your age should define who you are and what you are capable of. But you are so much more than a 1year old. You are inquisitive yet reserved, rambunctious yet composed, happy yet whiny, selfish yet selfless. You are a wonder to behold but most importantly you are mine.

I love you forever,

Mum xxx